After Saturday’s 3-for-4 performance, Ramirez is now hitting .404 with 16 homers, 13 doubles and 49 RBIs in just 47 games since being traded to Los Angeles. In that time he leads the Majors in batting average, on-base percentage (.490) and slugging percentage (.760) and ranks among the leaders in homers.

Never before has a guy who was hitting .300 with decent power numbers been so obviously jaking it in search of a way to get a better contract. What Scott Boras and Manny did here is pretty reprehensible, but then I couldn’t care less about the Red Sox. Had it happened to a team I cared about, I’m be pretty angry. Sadly, for my credibility as a baseball fan, I just find it all the more hilarious.

If you’re going to pay a flake $20 million dollars a year, then I suppose you’re stuck keeping him happy too.

I read a Boston guy who is begging not to have the carnival of a Dodger-Red Sox World Series – I’m so jaded that now that’s all I want to see.

What will it take for Manny to round the bases for a game winning home run against the Sox – six and a half minutes?

Things have certainly changed since Kirk Gibson.

However, minus the War Record, Manny probably resembles Ted Williams a lot more than Red Sox fans would be willing to admit.

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I just found this and it’s pretty fascinating and show’s how much work it takes to be really good at something. The first clip is early Mitch and although the wording of his jokes is identical to stuff he later kills with he totally hasn’t found his style. Below, he’s the most lovable, skewed, missed performer of the last 10 years.

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I’ve talked about this before – I watch award shows – I despise award shows – etc etc but finally the Emmy’s have come up with the ultimate puff catagory:

Outstanding Host For A Reality Competition Program

And the nominees are:

Ryan Seacrest – American Idol

Tom Bergeron – Dancing With The Stars

Howie Mandel -Deal Or No Deal
 
Heidi Klum – Project Runway
 
Jeff Probst – Survivor

Obviously, Seacrest needs to win this thing. Then they should have a tribute to Dick Clark, where they wheel that guy onto the stage and Seacrest, after giving a five minute speech on what an inspiration Dick has been to him, will bite Dick’s head off and declare that he is now not only the most powerful man in showbusiness, but the most powerful man in the world.

He will then have sex with Lindsey Lohan in a pay per view event and declare her rumored lesbianism cured.

He will then go to Iraq and host a “Who’s the most committed fanatic alive” competition, which will somehow bring peace to the region.

He will then run for President as an independant with Paris Hilton as his running mate.

Paris will make both Joe Biden and Sarah Palin look like fools in the first Vice-Presidential Debate with a Red Carpet, which will ironically be hosted by Seacrest.

Seacrest will then win by a large margin despite being two years too young to occupy the office.

He will then solve our fossil fuel problems; convince totalitarian leaders in Africa to stop killing their people and instead feed them; unite all religions by convincing them to abandon Jesus, Muhammud, or whoever else they are into in favor of whoever was voted People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive that year.

Having then shown the world how easy it is to live peacefully and happily. He will form a SS squad that will in one fell swoop kill any person alive who isn’t pretty enough to get by the velvet rope at whatever restaurant it is that Ashton Kutcher, Danny Masterson, and that guy who played Fes own in Los Angeles, forever eliminating ugliness from the planet.

Of course, he will then step down and resume his hosting duties on American Idol, because really that’s more important than any of that other crap anyway.

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Stick Figure Cartoon

Someone sent me this about 6 months ago – all the best satirical cartoon work is done by people with rudimentary drawing skills - South Park and Beavis and Butthead being at the top of the heap.

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That’s Nick Leeson the patron saint of idiot traders, who kept gambling until he bankrupted one of Europe’s oldest banking institutions, basically just to cover his constant and increasing incompetence. He makes the leaders of the subprime meltdown look like geniuses.

But here’s the real issue you have to ask yourself, when you think of entities that are gambling with fantastic amounts of money – and honestly it’s their main job to convince you that it’s investing not gambling.

Let’s say you have the ability to make the following bet.

You’re running a hedge fund full of a bunch of rich people’s money, when you identify the following opportunity.

You have an 80% chance of making yourself one of the richest people on the planet if things go well and do really well for your investors.

Now if things get ugly (1 in 5) you’ll lose lots of rich people money and throw the entire financial system into a state of monumental chaos – and have to find another job.

Not much downside really, unless you have a conscious.

Hopefully, people don’t seek out these situations, but usually when they find themselves saddled with it – their inclination is to just pray that things will work out, which probably isn’t the best way to run billions of dollars.

Leeson, of course, didn’t even have any upside. He was just trying to save his job, which is probably the case with a lot of these guys. I’m not sure if that makes it better or worse.

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