Domino’s Oreo Pizza


There is little doubt that I have the worst diet in modern American History. I haven’t eaten a pea, carrot, or any other cooked vegetable since I was a baby. I’ve had millions of annoying people pass me in the hall as I was about to down a morning meal of Diet Coke and a Snickers bar and say “Hey, Breakfast of Champions!” But seriously, this new product and its attendant commercial literally makes me scared for the future of mankind. Stuck in the Andes, I think I’d eat a dead rugby player first.

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