I like to consider myself a pop culture satirist. Today is a sad day for me, because I can think of absolutely nothing to say about this letter of “advice” that Pamela Anderson wrote to President-Elect Barack Obama that would be funnier than the letter itself.
Here’s my best effort – Pam how about getting someone besides Tommy to spell check your important missives. Damn. Not even close. Nothing is funnier than this letter so I’ll just reproduce it. Hopefully, Pam will not sue me.
Here it is Barack – now get on it – Pam has spoken.
One more thing Pam – erroring on the safe side by castrating all suspected child molesters totally contradicts your following point on Guantanamo Bay. I’d totally be willing to be your personal secretary. Believe me, there’s nothing about me that would make Tommy jealous.
Dear Mr. Obama:
My thoughts/hopeful ideas-: -Free Leonard Peltier- This injustice is just breeding Hate and discrimination. It would be very meaning ful to the Native American people and all of us ho have watched and been saddened by a broken system (There are too many people in jail that don’t need to be there-it IS a broken system- that enrages more people than it helps) – not saying that there aren’t people who need to be jailed while determining their fate- but Jail should be a holding cell for justice and not a lifelong waste of taxpayers money to run a spa for criminals-how does this improve society? Especially when there are real threats to our most precious citizens -our children- in most cases child molesters are walking free.
Government must Castrate every molester-or potential molester- error on the safe side- if any child pornography is found in anyone’s possession-or anyone creating such atrocities-or if any child Is brave enough to come forward (at any young age to bring attention to a potential molester- listen) they need to be taken very seriously and see that justice is served-The abuse is way worse than any trial could be- our children need more protection and justice seen. It needs to be PREVENTED not just punished. I think we should Legalize Marijuana, tax and monitor -farm Hemp etc-this would make our borders less corrupt and then I think eventually this will be more secure option and save children in the long run – we should be able to farm Hemp in America- it’s just silly— it would create jobs- and be good for environment. Bring our Troops home safely- Stop the killing and work with Veterans to secure a peaceful way world wide-using their 1st hand wisdom lovingly across all borders together. It is not a war Economy anymore- obviously- Stop all these garbage, wasteful and ineffective ,ancient animal tests (from 80 years ago?)- create a REAL working dedicated and active group of people assigned to this issue- science is suppose to be progressive? We need to get with it- update like Europe has – it’s an embarrassment and nobody wishes this senseless cruelty to go on. Please get rid of this private insurance and private health care system- it’s corrupt and doesn’t work- Government should take over both those areas- supplying secure government jobs where people are dedicated to their job and it is a proven system- Canada etc- supplying proper insurance to everyone – It’s much easier and government should supply these services for the taxes we pay- we would all be protected- pharmaceuticals would be affordable- to those that need it/especially our elderly- see that everyone has car insurance (there should not be an uninsured driver on the road) and health insurance- the same for everyone- isn’t this what we pay taxes for? Promote vegetarianism-which would help end world hunger- crack down on factory farming that is killing the environment and slaughtering so many animals- wastefully and carelessly and it’s unhealthy/and it’s just impractical- to think this is monitored/regulated effectively..
Please Shut down Guantanamo Bay-figure it out- make amends/stop torture- it’s time for peaceful solutions- and cooperation world wide sharing resources and protecting each other- education, missionary work- bring the world together help each other- with resources now- its considered a very small place- We are each other’s keeper no matter what side of the border we were born-nobody is less than. And if people are hard working why cant they work and pay taxes in America- if they have no criminal record- why do we have illegal immigration it should be made easier for people to work here- all they want to do is work- some Americans sure have a sense of entitlement that’s unhealthy, unwise and selfish at times… Thank God it’s a new day!