Rate my Racism


I never mean to insult anyone. I’m probably more self mocking than practically anyone in the world, but no one ever gets that I never mean any harm. I was working at Citibank and I meet this young kid named Steve Dugan (not his real first name – not because I’m noble, but because I’ve forgotten it). Now this dude looks 1000% Asian. So I of course say, “How are you doing, I used to live in Chicago and I’ve met a lot of Dugan’s but never one that looked like you.” Apparently, he was quite proud of his Irish origins and I was spoken to about the incident. Doesn’t anyone have a sense of humor any more?

Somewhere my ex girlfriend is saying, “How can he possibly not understand how I found him to be a social embarrassment?”

Fuck it, if I were Mr. Dugan I’d be getting a DNA test cuz that kid looked about as Irish as Nelson Mandella. JOKING!

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