Richland County Sheriff Leon Lott: Idiot of the Century

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Oh my, someone famous in my County took a bong hit. What will the children think? This is a crime. I’m on the case. It has nothing to do with getting my name out there or Michael Phelps’ fame. Pretty soon people all over South Carolina will be smoking pot. All industry will stop. The owner of Doritos will take over the world. He’ll enslave our entire couch obsessed country!

Worst cop ever since Barney Fife. Hopefully, he too only has one bullet.

Aren’t there 90,000 ex My Space pedophiles to hunt down?

Bill Hicks: No, I don’t do drugs anymore, either. But I’ll tell you something about drugs. I used to do drugs, but I’ll tell you something honestly about drugs, honestly, and I know it’s not a very popular idea, you don’t hear it very often anymore, but it is the truth: I had a great time doing drugs. Sorry. Never murdered anyone, never robbed anyone, never raped anyone, never beat anyone, never lost a job, a car, a house, a wife or kids, laughed my ass off, and went about my day.

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