I finally won the internet – Worst Power Pop Bands of all Time!

My Top Ten List of Worst Power Pop Bands of All Time

1 Badfinger – committing suicide does not evince the feel good mood of the Beatles no matter how good the songwriting or the harmonies

2. The La’s – Everyone says Lee Mavers was a genius but I only ever heard There She Goes and I loved it but I couldn’t afford the rest of the album and I have no idea what he’s done since

3. The db’s – I really loved their album’s with Chris Stamey, but then he left the band and then I realized that most of the power pop stuff was by Holsapple and the Stamey stuff was just really weird – I got confused so I no longer listen – they supposedly did a couple of albums as a duo but I was too cheap to buy them

4. Raspberries – Everyone goes crazy about that part during Overnight Sensation where Carmen made the singing sound like it was coming out of a cheap car stereo, but if I wanted shit to sound like a cheap car stereo I’d get a cheap car stereo – plus false endings are a cheap gimmick and I’m offended by the connotations of underage sex initiated by a young girl in Go All the Way plus it should be The Raspberries – Raspberries makes no sense

5 Big Star – I heard all the music Alex Chilton recorded with the Box Tops who are the most underrated pop band of all time and he had a deep voice at like 17 then with Big Star he sounded totally different with a much higher voice – he was clearly faking one of the two voices and I can’t handle inauthenticity. Plus “September Gurls?” Prince invented emojies that’s just bad spelling

6. Too Much Joy – They recorded an LL Cool J song and then did that tribute concert to 2 Live Crew – power pop is nothing to be silly or to make political commentary about

7. Marshall Crenshaw – I really liked his first album, but then he lost his hair and I can’t listen to bald artists. Plus he played Buddy Holly I think in Peggy Sue Got Married but John Lennon in Beatlemania – make up your mind plus I heard Beatlemania sucked – and you could tell Kathleen Turner was too old to play a teenager and Nic Cage was just weird as hell and not in a Con Air good way

8. Nick Lowe – I really liked Pure Pop for Now People but then I heard in England the album was called Jesus of Cool and that offends me

9. Rockpile – I don’t care what the contract issues were I can’t buy a NIck Lowe album and then a Dave Edmunds album and then another and another and then finally an album by the actual band and Billy Bremner sings Heart too damn fast – plus Nick should really have known what key that Everly Brothers song was in

10. The Beatles – their first four or five albums i can hear their influences way too much Everly’s check, Little Richard check, Chuck Berry check – girl groups check – obscure Arthur Alexander records no one had ever heard of – I get it you lived by the docks and had excellent taste in music, but then they got so high and pretentious they let Ringo sing. I prefer the sound of the Beatles as done by Cheap Trick, but I met Rick Nielson at his Pizza Place and he was a dick to me then he kicked Bun E Carlos out of the band and replaced him with his son – if I want to see an over the hill act with someone’s son replacing a key band member I’ll go see Van Halen.

Honorable Mention: Jon Brion – Everyone tells me how great he is but he had a band the Grays and they did one album and quit – then he released one solo album and it didn’t sell so he quit. He’s a quitter and from what I can tell from the charts he hasn’t done anything since! I much prefer Fiona Apple, Aimee Mann, Rhett Miller, Spoon, and whoever does the soundtracks to those awesome Paul Thomas Anderson movies