David Caruso the worst actor alive

Jim Carrey sort of started out as what Carrot Top became, albeit one with amazing physical dexterity, and became one of the edgiest comedians ever. If he’s at an awards show, I’m dying to find out what he has up his sleeve.

I don’t watch the CSI shows because I hate seeing blood and guts on TV. I watch House sporadically, but the second something gross comes on the screen, I’m out of there. Every once in a while I’ll flip by the one that has David Caruso on it and just be amazed at how awful he is. It’s like if William Shatner actually thought he was being a good actor on Star Trek or something. I know a lot of people have said it, but wow, it only takes about three lines of dialogue from him to make you think, “wow midgets could do this role better.”

The other day I watched the last ten minutes of an episode, which makes it my longest attempt at CSI (William Peterson is a god – so don’t get mad if the real one is good, I’m sure it must be and if it had been around earlier OJ would have went to jail the first time.).

Here’s what I saw.

A lawyer who stole all of the assets of a divorcing couple is murdered and the things that were stolen disappeared. Both the husband and wife accuse the other of doing the lawyer. The husband is wearing the expensive watch that was stolen. The wife is wearing the diamond earrings that were stolen. Yes, these are the dumbest criminals ever! When confronted with this damning evidence by the great red hope, they come clean and admit that they somehow managed to simultaneously stab the lawyer to death with the knife from their wedding cake!

Now that’s good entertainment! (Should I put not? Everything I write is so over the top sarcastic and some people still don’t get it. It’s depressing sometimes.)

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