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HSP Season 6 Ep. 1

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Yes, the best poker show on television is back and better than ever. Welcome to Season 6 of the Game Show Channel’s High Stakes Poker or as the pros like to call it, “Who wants to win Phil Hellmuth’s money?”

This year’s big news – AJ Benza, gonzo!

Here’s why the executives at the Game Show Network pull down the Canseco dollars. Someone up in corporate realized that they could replace Benza, who essentially knew nothing about poker; had zero chemistry with his co-host Gabe Kaplan; and was about as popular as the second group of Sweathogs that led to the cancellation of Welcome Back Kotter – with a hot chick who knew that flopping a set was a good thing! Genius! We can only hope that this will become a trend and NBC will bump the bilious and ubiquitous Ali Nejad from Poker after Dark and replace him with Jennifer Tilly, who will hopefully do all of her commentary from her own picture in picture booth wearing impossibly low cut dresses. Actually, now that I think about it, the low cut remark is a thankfully redundant statement when it comes to Tilly.

Why isn’t Jennifer Tilly spending Sam Simon’s money on HSP?

“Sir, AJ Benza is on line 2. He says he’ll take a pay cut to do Season 6.”

Benza has been replaced by the apple of Norman Chad’s eye, Kara Scott, who has gone deep into the World Series of Poker main event and thankfully isn’t Tiffany Michelle.

“Sir, AJ Benza is on line 2. He says he’ll do Season 6 for free.”

My suggestion that Gabe be replaced by Carrot Top was sadly ignored.

“Sir AJ Benza is on line 2. He says he’s willing to be the bartender on Season 6.”

Of course, the big question on everyone’s mind as we enter Season 6 has to be “Will the stakes be high enough to make Phil Ivey care enough to look at his cards and stop betting the GNP of most third world nations that every flop will be predominantly red?”

Oh look. As they were introducing the players and before the first hand was dealt, Gus Hanson has turned quads against Daniel Negreanu’s flopped straight. Who could have seen that coming?

 “Just wanted to get it out of the way early,” says the earnest Kid Poker.

Now, here’s why I love this show. As Kara is introducing the new season, the first words shown from a poker player’s mouth are from Tom Dwan, who asks someone, “By the river, did you find your balls?” That’s better dialogue than the last two seasons Heroes produced combined!

Also interspersed with the intro, Phil Ivey saying “this is going to be the sickest call of all time” for the 7,321st time. Over under on the number of hands that will be described as sick in this episode: 23 and that’s just for Antonio Esfandiari.

Eli Elezra: Godddd blrlrlrlbr …. Why didn’t you pull the trigger?

And thus we finally find out how the AJ Benza affair was resolved. Let his name never be uttered on this show again. Hit the “I’m all in” High Stakes Poker theme music.

Here’s Gabe and sadly still not Carrot Top (who is probably just down the street at some seedy gym doing steroids).

Gabe: Welcome to High Stakes Poker Season 6? This year’s theme: All Dwan – all Ivey – all the time!

He introduces Kara who will not be in the booth with him. Kara will be doing sideline commentary on the floor, which will probably entail doing a lot of leering at Patrik Antonius.  It should be noticed that Kara is dressed conservatively enough to remind us that she is here for her brains as well as her beauty, which is the first official first bad beat of High Stakes Poker Season 6!

The set this year features a huge High Stakes Poker ice sculpture, which probably took up about 90% of the show’s budget.

Here’s the lineup.

Seat 1: Well known cash game fish, Phil Hellmuth

When the Poker Brat is playing cash, the vultures stop betting golf with Michael Jordan. Just like Jordan, Phil has a huge ego and is so competitive that he just can’t stop getting his money in bad. Expect Daniel Negreanu to make at least 47 references to this in the weeks to come.

Seat 2: Phil Ivey, America’s favorite degenerate gambler

 Last night in Miami, Tiger Woods was heard telling a Hooters waitress that he was kinda like the Phil Ivey of golf. Wow, have things changed.

Seat 3: Andreas Hoivold from Norway

I’m not going to even pretend that I know who this is, but it should be noted that like many from this region he looks like he’s never heard of a comb and just got hit in the head by a softball.

Seat 4: The nicest guy in a grubby biz, Mr. Daniel Negreanu

Negreanu has had terrible luck on this show, but usually makes all his money back cross booking Hellmuth.

Seat 5 Gus Hanson

This year Gus promises to play at least one hand that Phil Hellmuth would consider raising with on the button. That should prove to be very exciting.

Seat 6 Tom Dwan

Thankfully, this footage appears to have been filmed before he was cleaned out by Isildur1.

Seat 7 Antonio Esfandiari

Antonio seems to have had that Siamese twin procedure done, because as of now Phil Laak is nowhere in sight.

Seat 8 Dario Minieri

Dario is essentially Harry Potter, if he was bred in Italy and appeared really grubby and hung over at all times.

Starting stacks: Everyone has 200k except for our two aggro-heroes Dwan and Ivey who each start with a half a mil. Nice!

Hand 1

Hoivold raises with 9c 10c and is called by Phil Hellmuth’s Ac Jh.

Flop Qc 6c 4h

Hoivold bets and takes down the pot.

Gabe compares Hoivold’s shirt to something purchased at an “Army Navy store in Oslo.”

Is it too late to ask ESPN for permission to use Norman Chad? Really, shouldn’t it be a law that all poker shows be hosted by Norman Chad?

First Bombshell of Season 6: Prop betting has been banned

See, I told you those executives knew what they were doing. This means Ivey will be forced to actually play poker and I’ll have a fraction of an idea what’s going on. Too much of previous season’s player chat was dominated by “I hit for trips” and “I’m on for doubles” during hands they weren’t even contesting.

Second Bombshell of Season 6: Dwan breaks this rule after one hand

Hand 2

Gus Hanson folds 5 3 off suit. No one saw that coming. Is it too early to have Kara bend into the frame and interview Gus on this decision?

Dwan raises to $3100 with Qd Jh

Dario raises with Kd Jh, because after all he’s Dario and that’s what he does. He makes it $10,600.

Antonio: Dario meets Durrrr

Gabe: Godzilla vs. Mighty Mouse

Then in his best high pitched helium voice Gabe literally sings/screeches the Mighty Mouse theme song: “Here I come to take your stack!” It’s not Carrot Top but fairly entertaining and nearly as ridiculous.

Uh oh. Phil Hellmuth has woken up with a “top ten” hand, Ac Qh!

Gabe ponders the range it would take to make Dario three bet, without pointing out that the answer is any two cards.

And Phil Hellmuth folds. Sigh.

This seems to be Phil’s latest televised trick. He folds everything, gets blinded out, and tells the world that he nevertheless played “World Class” poker despite never so much as picking up a decent Ace!

Dwan mocks Dario for only having $200,000 in front of him and calls.

Gabe claims that there are more Italians in Northern New Jersey than in Rome. Can we have the GSN staff check into the factual legitimacy of that joke?

Flop 9h 6h 7h

Dwan checks to Dario who bets $12,200 because after all that was hardly a dangerous flop for his K 10 hand that doesn’t contain a heart. Dwan calls.

Gus predicts that someone is sure to lose at least 200k in this hand and laughs at them having to immediately give an on camera interview post carnage. Yes, Gus understands the real appeal of this show.

Gus Hanson (mockingly, but with true affection): I love High Stakes Poker!

The Turn is the 2 of hearts which means that Dario is now drawing dead to Dwan’s jack high flush. They both check.

The river is the 2c.

Shockingly, Dwan checks it down! Somewhere Mike Matusow chokes on some popcorn and says, “I would have bet half a million that I’d never see that!”

Heat Alert: Phil Hellmuth immediately seethes when he sees Dwan’s hand and realizes that his queen of hearts would have taken down the hand. This is important because it helps us understand what is to come. Phil should have shown up late to this like he does in tourneys. Actually, Phil should have just skipped this and played a tourney.

Daniel and Gus mock Phil, with Gus suggesting that Hellmuth laid down the A 10 of hearts.

Two hands in. Two more reasons to mock Phil Hellmuth. HSP never fails to deliver.

Hellmuth claims that he was planning on re-raising Dwan before Dario butted his way in. Phil Claims that he would have taken Durrrr for 50k had he played the hand.

Antonio Esfandiari (laughing like milk is coming out of his nose): It’s that easy, huh?

How the hand would have actually played out. Dwan would have put Phil all in on the river and he’d be crowing for the next 10 minutes at what a disciplined lay down he made.

More Hellmuth brilliance: Durrr, I gamble buddy, we put in 16,000 each when the blinds were 200 the other day. He had 10 jack. I had 9 7 off suit.

Antonio: How’d that work out for you?

Hellmuth (sighing): Not well.

Hand 3

It’s folded to Hellmuth who has Ac Qc!

Gabe predicts a raise and laughs as Phil limps in … from the button! This couldn’t possibly end well for the Poker Brat.

Ivey 10d 6s

Gus Jh 8d

Flop 3s Kd 4h

No one flops anything. Phil still has the best hand, which means the probability that he will win this pot (seeing that he has position and everything) is very low.

Ivey bets $2000. Hellmuth calls.

Turn 8c

Ivey bets $6000 and Phil folds.

Ladies and Gentleman – Phil Hellmuth on the power of position!

Gabe mocks Phil, who has now played the first three hands badly. This show basically writes itself.

Hand 4

It’s folded to Phil who has Ac Jh! He makes it $4000. Can Hellmuth make it 4/4!

Oh the humanity! Phil Ivey has QQ! How is there any way that Ivey doesn’t make the Poker Brat his bitch here for the 4,777th consecutive time?

Ivey makes it $15,000.

Phil Hellmuth in the words of Teddy KGB “WON’T BE PUSHED AROUND!”

Phil makes it $55,000. Quick someone call 911, there’s about to be a huge accident.

Ivey’s mouth starts to water. He gazes lustily at Hellmuth’s stack. Ivey does his best not to start laughing and then of course shoves all of his chips into the middle as fast as he can.

Hellmuth: I’m thinking about making a thin call

Hanson and Negreanu have huge gaping smiles on their faces. Neither one of them could stop smirking even if their very lives depended on it.

Hellmuth: I think you might have 8 9 of spades or something

Negreanu has now fallen off of his chair laughing like he’s on one of those celebrity roast shows.

Antonio (huge smile): He’s the best in the world, Phil Hellmuth!

Now, it must be noted that not only does Phil think that he has the odds to call; Phil Hellmuth actually seems to think that he’s way ahead! Good read, buddy.

 Really, there is no way they could have planned this any better. Props to the guys at the GSN who decided to hire writers to rig the deck and throw coolers around left and right like they were nickels.

Hellmuth: You’re just trying to play me

Gabe predicts that Hellmuth will fold and he does.

Hellmuth: Nice bluff, Phil

Dwan offers to pay Phil Ivey two thousand dollars to show any hand better than a pair of jacks.

Ivey: I sweat $10,000 chips. It’s not really worth it to me

Hellmuth: I had AJ

Negreanu (cackling): You did not!

Gus Hanson – the king of laughter: There was your 50k lunch!

Cue the Hellmuth self pity: I’ve had AJ or better every hand and I’m down 50 already.

Gus: … which must be nice

Hellmuth (putting on his sunglasses): I should have called, I think

More laughter from the entire table – which is getting repetitive – just assume that everything Hellmuth says or that is said about Hellmuth from now on is followed with the laugh track they used to use on Welcome Back Kotter.

Gus: I think I changed my mind. I might stay all day

Antonio: How could you leave?!

At this point even the guy from Norway mocks Phil, but since he mumbled it quietly it had to be reiterated and translated by Negreanu. Essentially, Hellmuth said “you guys are going to try and outplay me” and Andreas mockingly said “I thought that was impossible?” Nice one, guy from Norway!

Hand 5:

Antonio limps with As Qs

Minieri calls with 3d 3c

Hellmuth calls with Ks 2s

Ivey notes that he has the same hand again and mockingly throws it away. Negreanu shrieks like a little girl.

 Really, someone needs to step in and give Hellmuth the mandatory ten count.

Negreanu calls with Kh 10c

Hanson calls with 6h 4s

Dwan checks his 7h 4d

Gabe steps in and berates the young kids for talking too much, while someone was losing $50,000. Yes, everyone here understands the appeal of the show. Well, everyone but its host.

Where was Kara with the on the spot interview with Phil after going 4/4?

Flop 7d 6s 5s

Antonio with the nut flush draw and Hellmuth with the second nut flush draw. C’mon this has to be rigged. Do I hear Five-peat? Dwan and Hanson have open enders. This should get bloody.

The screen shows that Hellmuth is 0% to win this hand only because Hoivold has an automatic chop with him, but sometimes the screen is right even when you don’t think it is, because Phil is certain to lose this pot.

Dwan bets $3800. Antonio calls. Hellmuth calls.

As Gus folds, Gabe points out the carnage that would be a spade on the turn for Hellmuth.

And of course, just like in Pro Wrestling, there it is – the 8 of spades on the turn. Dwan makes an ignorant straight and Phil Hellmuth is about to say, “Chips!”

Antonio bets $11,100

The room gets quiet. Hellmuth just calls, and Dwan folds.

River 10h

Gabe acknowledges that paramedics have been called to the building. He might want to call the riot squad too, because this Hellmuth tantrum could get really ugly.

Antonio bets $32,000

Hellmuth: I know that it’s an easy call. Let me just think for a second, though.

Phil has a big smile on his face that’s about to be knocked off.

Gus goads the Brat by offering 10-1 that he doesn’t raise!

Shockingly, Hellmuth doesn’t raise and loses the minimum.

Even more shockingly, the whole room seems sad to see Hellmuth keep his stack. They all know that optimal play from Hellmuth is no good for the game or the show.

Norwegian guy: Well played Mr. Hellmuth.

It’s ok, there’s still plenty of time for Phil to lose his first buy in.

Shocking to the nth degree – not a word from Hellmuth, who instead hangs his head like a kid who has just been told that his dog got hit by a school bus. I want my rant. Gabe, someone owes me the previously agreed upon Phil Hellmuth “I just got coolered again” rant!

Thankfully, GSN has provided us a post game interview with both players.

Kara:  Vey bad timing for you isn’t it?

Phil rolls his eyes and smiles: I mean, I was extraordinarily unlucky, especially against Antonio, who has just completely run me over for a long time. I actually feel good that I didn’t lose more.

Huh? Did someone slip the Poker Brat a valium? Did Phil Hellmuth not get the script? Why hasn’t that ice sculpture been heaved through the window?

I know that Gabe applauded Phil’s restraint, but I have to say it. This is not good for the show.

A similar interview appears with Antonio, who is still cursing himself for not checking the river to the Poker Brat, who he knew was strong, but then again who wouldn’t be thrilled to be on this show and get to misplay the nuts?

Hand 6

Back to the action: Phil Hellmuth has straddled! Boy, he just doesn’t learn does he?            

Gabe: I have never seen Phil Hellmuth straddle voluntarily!

What was really out of character is that Phil has lost 5 straight hands and has yet to have any F bombs edited out of the show. Pre-show odds on that as set by Phil Ivey (all bets must be at least 6 figures): 1000-1

Hoivold raises to $3600 with 8c 9c

Gus calls with two red 6’s.

Dwan calls with Ac 5d

Antonio raises to $25,000 with Ah Kh

Gabe makes a joke at Hoivold’s expense, something about the Olympics in Lillehammer. Gabe was up all night learning trivia about Norway, and he needed to because he no longer can just cruise by insulting AJ Benza.

Everyone folds.

Dwan tells Ivey that for him 200 hands is 15 minutes, expertly pointing out just how slow this televised game is for a first rate mind like his. We’ll be lucky to hit ten hands in this episode.

Gabe: Here that’s all six seasons of High Stakes Poker

Hand 7

Dwan, Ivey, Hanson and Hellmuth see the flop for the minimum.

Ivey flops the best hand with 5s 3h and bets $3,000 at the Qd Qs 5c board.

Dwan floats him

Gabe (on Dwan): He’s got nasty thoughts in mind here.

Turn 4s

Ivey checks.

Dwan bets $7.400 with his Jc 10h and Ivey folds the best hand.

Ivey looks at Dwan with his best Terminator “I must punish him later” glare.

30 Seconds with Kara Scott

A new feature! Sweet. This week Kara asked a few friends to describe Phil Hellmuth in ten words or less.

Eli Elezra: Phil Hellmuth eez a crybaby

Actually, it sounded like he said fry baby, but that wouldn’t make sense would it? It could be Phil’s next endorsement. “You have to get the oil out when friends bring over the Phil Hellmuth Fry Baby! You’ll never have so much fun eating Chicken McNuggets anywhere in the world!”

Antoinio: Doesn’t shut up

Hellmuth: Trying to be the greatest

Dwan: Phil Hellmuth is tall

Is Dwan always stoned or was he just born like that?

Hellmuth: Passionate. Fun loving.

Antonio: Egotistical. Egotistical and did I mention egotistical?

Dario (almost laughing as he gives him the watered down complement): A wonderful tournament player

Norwegian dude who I’m 100% convinced is also stoned and laughing hysterically on the inside: The best player there will ever be…  no one is better than him.

I’m starting to love Andreas Hoivold!

Final count: Everyone agrees to call Phil a great player as long as he’s willing to leak off all of his money to them in cash games. Silent was Daniel Negreanu, who apparently couldn’t stop laughing long enough to answer.

Gabe notes that the European players seem to have more respect for Phil, but it seems to me that Gabe just doesn’t get Norwegian sarcasm.

Hand 8

Phil H, now heavily on tilt, raises to $2,000 with Jh 5h.

Paramedics! I swear we’re not crying wolf this time!

Ivey calls with Kh 9h. Can anyone not see where this is going?

The flop is 6d 4h 7h

Shocking!

Ivey bets $6,000

Here comes Hellmuth with his straight and flush draws. He makes it $26,000.

Gabe: Phil Ivey is going over everything that’s happened today as it pertains to this hand.

Ivey’s thoughts in reality: These stakes are too low. I could be eating at a good steak house right now and gambling millions on girls’ hockey right now. If I bust Hellmuth here, maybe they’ll let me leave so I can go play golf or shoot craps. Why didn’t they allow me to shoot craps during the filming of this episode? God, I hate that Full Tilt makes me show up at these things. Is Doyle at Bobby’s Room?

Ivey: How much money have you got?

Hellmuth (arrogantly): 90!

Phil Hellmuth just tried to intimidate an angry elephant with a fly swatter.

Ivey calls.

Turn Kd. Ivey is now 86%.

Have preparations been made to protect the ice sculpture?

Ivey checks.

 Hellmuth is all in. Oh the humanity.

Ivey, with all the passion of a guy who would rather be holding dice right now, takes about 3 seconds to call.

Daniel Negreanu: Geez, wow, that’s tough shape!

Yes, Daniel, there is no joy in Mudville. You guys were supposed to just shear the sheep! It was done much too quickly this time and you didn’t get a penny of it. In fact, most of it, as it always does, is going to go to Ivey.

Phil H has 6 outs.

Hellmuth: Want to deal it three times?

Ivey: No, let’s just get this over with before I fall asleep

Actually, he just said no, but I’m pretty sure that’s what he was thinking.

The ten of hearts comes on the turn and Phil Hellmuth has been felted by Phil Ivey!

Phil Hellmuth: Good game man

Gabe: It looks like Phil Hellmuth is leaving!

Uh oh, this wasn’t in the script was it?

Amarillo Slim: You can shear a sheep a hundred times, but you can skin it only once!  … Morons!

Really, there is no longer laughter at this table. It’s like a children’s bathroom funeral with a dead goldfish all of a sudden.

Gus (who wouldn’t stop laughing even if the President had just been shot): Well, the good news was you would have gone broke even if you checked the turn.

Phil is not amused and silently picks up his water bottle and leaves.

I would try to say that this was shocking, but he pulled the exact same routine at the last Full Tilt Million Dollar Cash Game overseas.

Phil leaving is always his best option in a televised cash game. Well, aside from not playing at all.

Some day Phil might rant about how badly he was coolered, but really what’s a better definition of tilt than to start straddling and opening pots out of position with J5 of hearts. Were you kids at home watching and taking notes? Not only that, but Phil’s tilt was caused by a hand he folded pre-flop!

Sorry folks. You no longer have Phil Hellmuth to kick around anymore.

This is truly a tragedy of epic proportions. It’s like we had Pamela Anderson in bed all to ourselves and we got way too excited and things ended in 30 seconds. Is Gabe going to be forced to make twee Norwegian city references for the rest of the season?

I hope for the sake of the Game Show Network that some executive is slipping double shots of Vodka into Dwan and Ivey’s Cokes.  Phil Hellmuth has been eliminated faster than Shannon Elizabeth in a $50,000 HORSE event!

Here’s Kara with Phil’s post mortem thoughts.

Kara: Did you make a conscious decision to come out here and lose all of your money in the first hour rather than dragging it out for the rest of the season?

Hellmuth: I came in with the intent on winning

Does that qualify as an admission of drug use on Phil’s part?

Hellmuth: The guy (Ivey) has been extraordinarily lucky against me. When I have my day against him I think I’m going to beat him for a million or two because I’m not afraid of him.

Phil then goes on to mock Ivey for not having a tournament bracelet in Holdem, which would make sense except for the fact that Ivey made more money in last year’s Main Event than Phil did back in the day for winning it. I’m guessing Phil Ivey is not worried about his legacy.

Day Phil Hellmuth takes $2 million off Ivey? The day he opens the Phil Hellmuth House of Craps! Come on down folks to the Phil Hellmuth House of Craps. Stay in our deluxe Phil Ivey suite constructed entirely out of 14 carat gold as per Mr. Ivey’s exact specifications!

Gabe: It’s good to know that Phil Hellmuth is not quitting poker. I was worried for a minute. I don’t remember anyone quitting after one bullet in all five seasons of High Stakes Poker

Yes Phil, you just got called a pansy by Mr. Kotter.

I wonder if Phil is more than a little shocked that they aren’t going to cancel the rest of the season. Yes, the game is actually going to go on without Hellmuth!

Hand 9

Antonio raises to $2600 with Ac 7c

Ivey calls 4s 4h

Hoivold calls with As Qc

Daniel Negreanu raises to $16,600 with 9d 6s, which clearly means that he forget to cross book Hellmuth and is now also on serious tilt.

Ivey calls. Hoivold calls.

The flop is 5h 4d Jc

Odds on Ivey making quads on Negreanu given Kid Poker’s history on the show: 1-10

Supposed real life odds: about 40-1

Daniel bets $25,000 against Phil Ivey’s set of 4s. Life is tough for Ivey, isn’t it? Hellmuth tosses cash at him, Negreanu tosses cash at him. He’d still rather be off flipping coins for a million a shot somewhere with Patrik Antonius.

Poker is literally the only time in Phil’s life where he isn’t gambling!

Ivey calls.

Turn is 10s

Daniel gives up. Ivey bets $60,000 and is extremely unhappy to find out that Daniel doesn’t have the hand he was representing.

A hand was played without Phil Hellmuth and the world didn’t end. Who knew?

Ivey is now up over a quarter of a million dollars. Phil Ivey yawns.

Hand 10

Ivey raises to $3000

Negreanu raises to $15,000 with 10s 5s.

Maybe Phil Hellmuth didn’t leave. Maybe he just took over Daniel’s body and started to play his stack.

Ivey folds

Dwan: Was that the small ball poker thing?

Negreanu offers his first true post Hellmuth laugh.

Hey kids, it’s the PokerStars.net Did You Know segment!

In this semi-commercial, (it’s all about mixing the ads in with the action these days) Daniel claims that someone probably made up the story about Wild Bill dying with Aces and 8s. He instead claims that Jacks full of Tens should actually be called the “dead man’s hand” because it was the first recorded instance of a man actually dying due to a losing a hand.

Thank you Daniel and thank you free poker site that couldn’t care less whether you play for real money over on their sister site.

Gabe makes a joke about Joe the Boss and Coney Island. AJ Benza isn’t there to laugh at it.

Hand 11

Hanson raises to $3300 with As 6s

Ivey calls with Ac Jc

Flop: 5 3 7 two clubs

That Phil Ivey never hits a flop.

Hanson bets $5600. Ivey raises to $23000.

Gus folds his gut shot.

Dario Minieri: Mumble, mumble, mumble … sheer aggression …mumble

Can we get a translator down here?

Gabe mentions Sammy Farha who is MIA. Damn, where have those comic yesterdays of Sammy and Jamie Gold gone? Actually, where has Jamie Gold gone?

Hand 12

Gus Hanson takes an irrelevant hand down with a pair of nines as Ivey plans a golf date with Negreanu.

Hand 13

Ivey raises to $3000 with 10s 9c

Antonio calls with Ad 7d

Flop As 10h 5c

They both check

The turn is the 9d because Phil Ivey always eventually has the best hand.

Ivey bets $5000. Antonio calls.

River 8s

Ivey bets $15,000 and Antonio pays off the King.

Hand 14

Hoivold raises to $5200 with two red fives

Daniel calls with Js 10s

Ivey calls with sixes and of course promptly flops a set when the board comes 4c Ks 6h

Hoivold bets $4400. Daniel calls. Ivey makes it $20,000

Daniel folds but something tells Kid Norway that Phil couldn’t possibly always have a hand. Don’t they get televised poker in Europe? 

Hoivold makes it $56,000 drawing fairly dead

Ivey pretends to care and then immediately shoves all in. Kid Norway folds as Ivey is too bored to even bother trying to trap the Euro as the rest of the group continues to chat about golf.

Phil Ivey is now up over $330,000 and the first episode of High Stakes Poker is in the can!

Next Week on High Stakes Poker: Eli is coming! Kid Norway pushes back! Gus Hanson is all in versus Ivey! Someone else goes busto and takes their ball home crying!

Grade for the Phil Hellmuth portion: A- great fun, not very good poker

Grade for the balance: C Ivey wins. Daniel talks about golf. In other news, the sun comes up tomorrow!

Moments that AJ Benza was missed. Possibly during Gabe’s Coney Island joke, but really the true answer is no more Coney Island jokes. Did I mention that Carrot Top was in town?

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